Blonde Musclewomen

An old, blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?'

The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, 'Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.

2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.

3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.

4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter.

5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

'Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?'

The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.'

Kidnapping - Blonde Style

There was a blonde who was down on his luck. In order to raise some money she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to a playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you."

The blonde then wrote a note saying: "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $200,000 in a paper bag and put it beneath the mango tree on the north side of the city playground". Undersigned: "A Blonde".

The blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning she checked, and sure enough a paper bag was kept beneath the mango tree. The boy was sitting next to the bag. The blonde opened up the bag and found the $200,000 in cash with a note saying, "How can a blonde do this to a fellow blonde? Take the money, and please leave my son." Undersigned: "Another blonde".

Almost Got Caught

Three girls all worked in the same office with the same female boss. Each day, they noticed the boss left work early.

One day the girls decided that, when the boss left, they would leave right behind her. After all, she never called or came back to work, so how would she know they went home early?

The brunette was thrilled to be home early. She did a little gardening, spent playtime with her son, and went to bed early.

The redhead was elated to be able to get in a quick workout at the spa before meeting a dinner date.

The blonde was happy to get home early and surprise her husband, but when she got to her bedroom, she heard a muffled noise from inside. Slowly and quietly, she cracked open the door and was mortified to see her husband in bed with her boss! Gently, she closed the door and crept out of her house.

The next day, at their coffee break, the brunette and redhead planned to leave early again, and they asked the blonde if she was going to go with them.

"No way," the blonde exclaimed. "I almost got caught yesterday!"