Corporate Rules

Rule-1

The Boss is always right.

Rule-2

If the Boss is wrong, see rule 1.

Rule-3

Those who work get more work. Others get pay, perks, and promotions.

Rule-4

Ph.D. stands for "Pull Him Down". The more intelligent a person, the more hardworking a person, the more committed a person; the more number of persons are engaged in pulling that person down.

Rule-5

If you are good, you will get all the work. If you are really good, you will get out of it.

Rule-6

When the Bosses talk about improving productivity, they are never talking about themselves.

Rule-7

It doesn't matter what you do, It only matters what you say you've done and what you are going to do.

Rule-8

A pat on the back is only a few centimeters from a kick

Rule-9

Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

Rule-10

The more crap you put up with, the more crap you are going to get.

Rule-11

If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it.

Rule-12

When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried.

Rule-13

Following the rules will not get the job done.

Rule-14

If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would get done.

Rule-15

Everything can be filed under "Miscellaneous".

Rule-16

No matter how much you do, you never do enough.

Rule-17

You can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work you are supposed to be doing.

Rule-18

In order to get a promotion, you need not necessarily know your job.

Rule-19

In order to get a promotion, you only need to pretend that you know your job.

Rule-20

The last person that quit or was fired will be held responsible for everything that goes wrong.